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Beauty Pageant Flash Fiction . . .Yes, It’s a True Story

Beauty Pageant Flash Fiction . . .Yes, It’s a True Story

I’ve been working on a flash fiction piece which is basically a short story with a word limit.  This one could only have a maximum of 194 words.  ‘The Fall’ is a chapter in my novel condensed into a tiny, tiny narrative.   I’m still working on it, and any (helpful) feedback is much appreciated. Yes, it’s a true story that happened to yours truly (which really makes this flash non-fiction??).  I wish I had it on film – I think it could have won one of those blooper TV show contests.  And to give a little context, I was Miss North Texas (teenage version) competing in the Miss Texas pageant way back in the 80s.

At the end I added a cringy video clip of a bad pageant interview.  I FEEL her pain, but her interview is awkward (and really funny).   So please enjoy . . .

The Fall


My glued hair stood high enough to hold a pencil, and my ego had inflated like a blow-up mattress.  I wore a strapless, green, sequined gown with a mammoth bow pinned to the back.  The emcee announced my name, and with my game face on and teeth smeared in Vaseline, I glided in my 3-inch heels across the T-shaped runway.

Turn-smile-slide, turn-smile-slide, turn-smile-slide, the lethargic seconds passed.  I stopped in the right place but didn’t notice until it was too late.

All at once, 1,000 gasps filled the ballroom as one of my emaciated heels wedged into a crack in the portable stage.  I fell backwards as gravity wrestled me to the ground.

Knees on the laminate floor, dress sideways and hair in one piece over my face, Miss North Texas looked more like a desperate animal caught in traffic.  I yanked my heel out of the crack, shifted the stupid Mermaid-like dress back in place, flipped my hair into a suitable coif, and scurried off to find the dignity I’d dropped.

I’d tasted the pride that comes before the fall, but I didn’t know the fall could be so awful.


Short cringy interview (not me) here.

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